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Forum
-> Interesting Discussions
Motek
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Fri, Apr 29 2005, 4:19 pm
mp wrote: | For those who think that people just choose to believe in evolution so they can avoid responsibility : In many ways it is much easier to be religious. Much, much easier. You have a whole comprehensive system of beliefs- if you do this, you will have a good life and be a good person and go to heaven. If you don't, you won't. If you are not religious, there are many more conflicts and many more difficult issues to decide. As the famous quote goes : " A believer just has to explain the existence of evil, while the atheist has to explain the existence of everything else" |
Anny wrote: | Quote: | In many ways it is much easier to be religious |
Being that I am a BT, I can tell you that it is much cheaper and easyer to be not frum. I am honored to be a Jew, a representative of the Almighty G-d on this Earth, but it is MUCH easyer to live my life like I want, not like G-d wants me to. |
anybody else have an opinion?
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imaamy
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Fri, Apr 29 2005, 5:58 pm
Easier in what way? Financially I would say yes, convenience-wise, yes. I usually don't hear FFB people say it is hard to be frum.
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roza
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Fri, Apr 29 2005, 7:19 pm
Quote: | I usually don't hear FFB people say it is hard to be frum. |
because they did not have an expirience of being not frum.
those who went off the derech have very hard time to come back.
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roza
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Fri, Apr 29 2005, 7:23 pm
psychologically it's easier to be frum- u know what's life for. and you have powerful moral support of Hashem's help - at any time.
non frum ppl rely on themselves or depend on other ppl only, this, I think, is more difficult.
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roza
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Fri, Apr 29 2005, 7:26 pm
oh, and from 'do- what-I-wand and have- fun' point of view- it's harder to be religious.
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SWatson
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Sat, Apr 30 2005, 5:50 pm
I am a BT. My opinion it is MUCH easier to be non religious. It took me about 10 years (!!) to make a desicion to be religious, it was very hard to agree to a lot of things, I had quite debates with myself, whether to spend Friday night in sinagogue singing "Lecha Dodi" (Friday Night Prayer) or stay at home to watch my favorite tv show. The last things which I couldn't overcome were - wearing pants and keeping kashruth (I come from a country where it was literally impossible for me at a time as a kid espessially). Basically, non religious life is NO RULES, while being religious requires me to do plenty of different things at a certain times, which makes life much more complicated and busier. Now when Im grown I realise whats better for me and Im happy I've chosen this way
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mom3boys
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Mon, May 02 2005, 12:50 am
I agree with Roza, from the have fun, no rules, no restrictions point of view, but I would imagine it is quiet difficult to live in a world without the absolute Truth.
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supermom
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Mon, May 02 2005, 6:59 am
put all that aside how about the school systems isn't it better to be religious then in the public schools from what I hear and see it is horrifying and to top it all off they act like wild animals from the jungle!!
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Pearl
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Mon, May 02 2005, 7:18 am
Quote: | supermom wrote: | put all that aside how about the school systems isn't it better to be religious then in the public schools from what I hear and see it is horrifying and to top it all off they act like wild animals from the jungle!! | |
now, with that I totally agree. a few of my friends are teachers in israeli secular schools, and the stories they have - behold and beware of israel's future!
but after the craziness of pesach, more than once I sighed "it's tough to be a (observant)jew".....it's much easier to be non-observant. even when one "fancies" the idea of being jewish, whenever it's not so convenient, they seem to just "put it aside" and have that delicious meal in that wonderful non-kosher restaurant, wearing that beautiful pair of trousers and top etc etc......
I do think observant life is way more fulfilling and rewarding, but easy? no!
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supermom
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Mon, May 02 2005, 7:22 am
it is not only the israeli schools it is everywhere!! I saw what was going on on the vidoe that I was watching amnon yitzchak and I couldn't believe what he was showing thank Hashem that I am jewish.
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Motek
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Wed, May 04 2005, 8:21 am
We generally associate "easy" with "freedom" as in "ah, now I'm free and can relax."
the Yiddish word for someone who is irreligious is "frei" (free)
but the mishna in Avos says, "there is no free person except he who delves into Torah study!"
Torah is synonymous with avoda, work! So how can the Sages say that a person who works and studies Torah is free?
And the answer that I read is that it's because a Jew's true nature is to do Torah and mitzvos, as it says in the mishna, "I was created to serve my Maker."
therefore, when a Jew does NOT do Torah and mitzvos, although he seems "free" and it's an easier life, but since this way of life is the OPPOSITE of his nature, it's actually AVODAS PERECH (hard labor)!
in Egypt, when the Jews were forced to do avodas perech, it meant that the Egyptians made the men and women reverse jobs. Even though women's work is physically easier than men's work (hard, physical labor), this was avodas perech for the men because it's not in their nature to do women's work.
I find this idea (from the Lubavitcher Rebbe) quite fascinating. It's HARD to be FREE from Torah and mitzvos!
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alef22
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Thu, May 05 2005, 10:57 am
Whenever I have a weariness that I am not getting the "benefits" of being frum (life still feels so overwhelming) all it takes is to pass by a corner where teenagers are hanging out. I thank H-shem with all my heart that my boys and girls are so straight and that their chevra is frum. I have recently married off two children and am deeply grateful that whatever mistakes we made as parents our children are establishing homes of kedusha. As difficult as life can be living a frum life, for me it would have been utter chaos without a Torah derech and the ability to reach out to H-shem. Being frum also means my husband is learning and davening and with all our conflicts still striving to improve. I don't see too many non religious couples working so hard (if they are even still married when the going gets tough).
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1stimer
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Thu, May 05 2005, 2:40 pm
I think it depends on which side you are looking at it from. For the irreligious, it is easier to be irreligious and for the religious it is easier (hopefully! ) to be religious.
I know a lot of people find that when they go through challenging times the thing that helped them is their belief in Hashem.
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Rivka
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Thu, May 05 2005, 5:08 pm
Ok, what MP said which motek quoted from, is that it is easier to be religious. This does not mean frum in anyway. It means if you have any questions about life and why things happen you know it's G-d's wish and you take that as given.
Being frum is very different. It is a lot easier to be not frum.
Especially financially. Everything is cheaper when you look at the alternative in non kosher shops.
But if you are born frum you find it easier to be frum than someone who wasn't born frum finds it. It isn't easy, but as with anything in life, you have to work hard to reap the benefits.
There are also certain levels of frum-ness and different ideas of what is correct. But I am using Frum as the basic keeps shabbos&yom tov, keeps kosher thing.
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amother
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Wed, May 11 2005, 1:55 pm
the basic consensus here seems to be that while it is easier in the financial sense to be not-frum, and maybe more fun, it is more satisfying emotionally and intellectually to be frum. you can rely on G-d, you are part of a more traditional and healthier society, etc.
I disagree. the frum world can be an intellectually and emotionally suffocating place. you are told exactly what you believe in so many different areas. you are not just told what you should believe, but you are just told this is what you believe, already.
I am sure many people disagree with me on this. It probably depends a lot on what you mean by frum, and how you came to your level of observance. also on your experiences, perhaps your parents or your teachers, if they presented things to you in a better way.
I would guess that if you're bt, you might not find what I am saying true at all because:
a) you had plenty of opportunity to think, and you chose this on your own.
b) people cut you more leeway to have different opinions. whereas, if you are ffb, specifically if you are lubavitch, people expect you to be an example and a teacher of others.
also, your opinion on this question probably depends a lot on your innate personality. what drives you.
as far as I go, I hate being told what to think and I have had too many bad experiences with it...
I am signed on as amother not because I am embarrassed, but because everyone who knows me knows I think this way... and I do not want to give away my identity on the rest of my posts.
thank you all for an enjoyable forum.
edited by moderator
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gryp
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Wed, May 11 2005, 2:21 pm
Quote: | I disagree. the frum world can be an intellectually and emotionally suffocating place. you are told exactly what you believe in so many different areas. you are not just told what you should believe, but you are just told this is what you believe, already | .
amother, Torah is a way of life not a part-time interest. the hashkafos you are told to believe come from Torah, the mitzvos and aveiros we are commanded about comes from Torah.
do you disagree perhaps with the 13 Ani Maamins where we recite 13 principals we must believe in or we are kofer (denying) the Torah?
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Rivka
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Thu, May 12 2005, 6:14 am
I have to agree on some things amother said. Because I felt like that in school, but then I realised being frum isn't being in a certain sect, it's just about keeping torah in your own way, not in a way others would like you to.
Also amother, you sound bitter, is it becuase of your school? Your teachers?
It sounds like your are Lubavitch. But if you are not then maybe the sect you are in isn't for you, be it Chassidish, Litvish, Mizrachi etc etc.
Maybe if you found yourself a different approach to things and a different approach to Judaism you might suddenly realise u enjoy being frum, you just don't enjoy a certain sect of frum...I hope I am making sense.
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Pickle Lady
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Thu, May 12 2005, 8:21 am
HMM... True I think it depends on your perspective. For me I am a BT and my life would be SO SO SO much easier if I wasn't frum. I would be able to be with family at simchas without having to talk to a rabbi. My husband would have been able to get a better job. When I was working I could have had a better job and actually used my vacations for vacations instead of Yom Tovim. Clothing would be co much easier. I wouldn't have to worry about tznius cloths which aren't easy to find. OK don't get me started on shabbos being a day of rest (yeah right). Lets talk about Pesach for a bit, just plain craziness.
I do kind of understand what amother is talking about cause I am a BT. Things I thought were my right to a decision over the rabbanim were telling me what to think. Like in our community we are told who to vote for when there is an election, I was shocked. Its my right to vote and I have the right to vote for who I want in office (which is none of them)
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supermom
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Thu, May 12 2005, 9:18 am
your last sentance picklelady was really funny because it is the absolute truth.
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Rivka
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Thu, May 12 2005, 8:54 pm
I know this is off topic, but Pickle-lady, I didn't even read your name thing I just look at the pictures generally (avatars) and I wondered what that picture was meant to be...it looks like an aubergine.
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