Would you stop working if?

Posted: Wed, Aug 15 2012, 11:59 am Post subject: would you stop working if?

I am iyh due with my first one end of Feb.. I was wondering did you quit your job after you had your baby?
Im married for a while and went thru alot till I got here, I feel like ive been working my whole life and now is time to sit and relax and enjoy mommyhood..
I dont make alot and if I will need a sitter ill come out with hardly anything...
What is your take on it?
just wondering..
If I do stop working we will be pretty tight.. but what can I do? I feel like I really need to take a break..

Diamond Member Joined: Aug 07 2006 Posts: 2556

You will find all sorts of answers - there are working moms, work-at-home moms, SAHMoms, working part-time moms, and so on. Only you, with your husband, can decide what's best for your family.

Under similar circumstances (at least as far as I can tell from your post), I did leave my job, and was very happy to do so. I went back to work when my child was in school.

Things to think about include health insurance (in the US), your husband's job security, your own career plans and your personality (some people prefer working, others don't).

Good luck - and I hope this helps!

Posted: Wed, Aug 15 2012, 12:30 pm Post subject: re: would you stop working if?

SAHM with just one baby can get very boring.
Maybe try to stay at your job as long as you can manage it.

I found working with 2 kids was very hard.

Posted: Wed, Aug 15 2012, 12:59 pm Post subject: re: would you stop working if?

Anonymous because no one knows I'm expecting yet (well obviously I know), I'm due a bit after you.

I'm tied to work with my company until at least mid-2014 and I'm really please about this. This is due to a very generous maternity leave policy which sees me well cared for until 9 months after the baby is born, then when I return to work, I get a lump sum and a head start on child care payments. If I were to leave my job at any point after that, even after returning to work, I would have to repay that lump sum until X many months after I have returned to work (which is calculated based on a number of factors, which is for me approx 4 months).

If I were to quit during the first 9 months after the baby is born, my maternity payments would be slashed.

I'm really lucky, I already work part time due to some health issues I've had, and my company is very accommodating, so I will stay for as long as I can do commuting...but in the next 5-10 years I want to leave the private sector and be a teacher, I already know that is what I want to do.

My mum said to me that it was much harder going back to work after having a 2nd than a first, and I see from my SIL that this is definitely the case (she didn't go back to work between first and second, and being away for that time period with no job ruined her career path).

The factors are clear, my choice is the right one for me, yours will be the right one for you. If you want time off, and can budget for it, then why not? Just make sure you get all the support you will be entitled too, and take advantage of any help you can. B'shaa Tova.

Posted: Wed, Aug 15 2012, 1:11 pm Post subject: re: would you stop working if?

I chose to continue working but cut my hours down a bit when I had my baby. Personally, being a SAHM isn't for me - I need time away from my son to really enjoy my time with him, and I appreciate the intellectual stimulation of my job, as well as the social aspect. And, my job carries our health insurance for my family, which my husband's job doesn't offer, so we need that. However, I wouldn't feel so comfortable leaving my baby at daycare for 9 hours a day, so I'm happy with the compromise I have.
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Diamond Member Joined: Oct 25 2007 Posts: 4858

As CM said, everyone's experience and perspective is a little different.

Statistically, researchers have repeatedly found that mothers who work part-time rate themselves as more satisfied with their lives than mothers who work full-time or SAHMs. But, of course, statistics don't deal with individuals or their circumstances.

But if it's possible, I think part-time work is an excellent place to start. Even if you don't come out significantly ahead after childcare costs, it gives you the opportunity for adult contact each day; helps get everyone (including baby) on a regular schedule; and helps give you an identity outside of "mommy."

At the same time, part-time work gives you those few extra hours in the day for errands, naps, or even just spending time with your baby. A lot of moms find that they enjoy their babies more when they're not with them 24/7.

Ultimately, though, you have to see how things go. A lot depends on the type of work you do; your employer; how long a commute you have; the kind of childcare you have; your baby's personality; and your DH's expectations. Just be willing to make changes. A difficult baby or a demanding employer can change the entire equation, no matter how thoroughly you've planned things!

Hatzlacha and b'shaah tovah!

Platinum Member Joined: Feb 20 2009 Posts: 7639

My income is absolutely necessary at this point, so I've never had the luxury of making the choice to stay home long term. However, I will say that I was happiest when I took a 3 month maternity leave and then went back to work part time. Full time work with kids is manageable if you have to do it- I did it with one kid. And of course some people prefer working FT. But PT works best for me. Being home all day got tedious after a while. My baby hates the car, so I really had to stay local. And if the weather was bad, I felt like I was suffocating indoors all day.

Active Poster Joined: Sep 01 2009 Posts: 97

when I had my first I returned to work after he was 4 months and I switched to part time.
this gave me the opportunity to be with my son and continue working, without taking one or the other
you can try whats best for your own situation
all the best!

Posted: Wed, Aug 15 2012, 4:30 pm Post subject: re: would you stop working if?

A couple of you wrote going back to work with a second is much harder...aside from the obvious (2 kids, not 1 anymore), what else did you find was more difficult? Im due next month iyh with my second and working full time. TIA!