Is this called spoiling DS? also need bedtime help.

Diamond Member Joined: Nov 30 2009 Posts: 4688

My baby has been sick and teething lately (runny nose, low grade fever, kvetchy)

Esp in the evenings he is cranky and wants to be held. standing up. He used to play on the floor or in his jumper for a while in the evenings. We would get home, I would feed and change him and then he would play while I worked on supper.

The past week or so he has been having many "off" days (due to the above reasons) and doesnt want to play. He wants to be held. and he wants you to stand. and he just cries till you comply.

I usually comply unless I really cant. but I try to get to him as soon as I can.

My husband on the other hand.... well he will pick him up. and then DS continues to cry. and cry. and DH wont stand up with him. He says there is no reason to spoil him.

Is that called spoiling? At what age does the "you cant spoil a baby" stop and spoiling start?

Also he used to go to bed really nicely. When he was really little I would put him down when I noticed signs of tiredness and he would go to sleep. Then at about 5 months we started a routine, bath (some nights) pjs/change daiper, feed, book, songs, bed. and that worked.

In the last two weeks he does not go to bed nicely. keeps sitting up and pulling himself up on the railing. wants to be held to fall asleep. or at least needs me to be touching his face up till a few minutes after hes asleep (or else he wakes up) or he keeps crying till I nurse him and then he nurses to sleep (never used to do that except in the middle of the night)

any tips?
TIA
_________________

Diamond Member Joined: Aug 07 2006 Posts: 2556

Diamond Member Joined: Nov 30 2009 Posts: 4688

Diamond Member Joined: Apr 18 2010 Posts: 3040

I think once the baby figures out how to manipulate you, it becomes possible to spoil them. The exact age varies depending on the child- mine started with that maybe 10-11 months. But when a child is sick, all that goes out the window. They are not trying to manipulate, they need you. It will take a few days to readjust once they're feeling better, but that's ok.

I agree with Morah. My baby will cry when I walk out of the room just because he wants me - then I don't necessarily go get him, esp since I know he will stop crying if I don't come back right away. But when he's sick or something is bothering him (and it's usually obvious) I go out of my way to hold him and cuddle him. I feel like that's my job as his mommy.
_________________