The Baby Bump - to flaunt or not to?

Executive Member Joined: Aug 07 2011 Posts: 331

I think there's a happy medium, like everything else.
I think there are flattering styles that are still modest and don't look like what my mom wore when she was pregnant with me!

Another factor in the glamorization of pregnancy in America is celebrities.

I remember when Sarah Jessica Parker was expecting James Wilkie. After she made the Bug-A-Boo the biggest thing, other celebrities were no longer afraid to be pregnant publicly. They were no longer afraid of their careers being affected. (For some reason, she is the one I associate with making pregnancy ok in Hollywood.)

Think about it: every celebrity is having kids. 20 years ago, they had to focus on their careers and worry about family later. No longer.

I'm 26, btw.

Gold Member Joined: Jan 03 2011 Posts: 1503

Diamond Member Joined: Nov 30 2009 Posts: 4688

I dont wear tight clothes when not pregnant. ditto when pregnant.

I tried not to get things that were to tight in the bust or that went under my belly (tho in my 9th and 10th months (yay overdue) even some of the pretty loose things that were sixe XL went under a bit) but for sure not anything that was designed to go under my belly.

I also have a "flatie" belly button that popped very fast. and even when wearing loose thick clothing (waist of skirt covered by shell, covered by sweater that never "went under" my belly) it still showed!!!

I tried bandaiding it but it itched. and I broke out.

I dont hide it- but I dont flaunt it.

and im 24
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Moderator Joined: Mar 29 2005 Posts: 18318

The problem is when something goes in when it should go out...both on top between the bust and the belly, and under the belly where a looser cut would not show the defintion of where your belly begins.
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I don't think one should flaunt. But tent like clothing would make me hide at home. Life has to go on...
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"You will have many many children and make successful shidduchim beh", rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
"It's all cultural, disagree respectfully", me

36

I think women are crazy to wear anything that is designed to show the shape of their belly or flaunt it in any way. Would you invite the ayin hora to your house for tea? And why do you think it's something to be proud of? You were blessed with carrying a child. Be grateful to Hashem. What is there to flaunt? And besides, any clothing that accentuates and shows off the shape of any part of the body is poshut not tzanua and distasteful.

Gold Member Joined: Mar 23 2007 Posts: 1877 Location: NY

This thread makes me want to buy this maternity tshirt:
http://www.cafepress.com/frankopinions.459001565

Well not really but I can't believe it even exists.
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I'm not the popular Mama Bear. I'm "the other one."

I'm 52 and I think that "showing the bump" is horrendously not tznius, just like I feel that all skin tight clothing, spandex, or anything form fitting is not tznius. There is a fine line between fitted clothing and between skin tight and therefore I wear only things that are a bit loose so that my bust is well covered and nothing pulls over it, ever, and the same goes for my hips and waist etc.

Tznius doesn't change when one is pregnant and the same women who would wear tight clothing over their pregnant stomachs, with belly button showing or not, are the same when not pregnant and they wear tight clothing over their hips, bust, arms and think that they are following "the letter of the law" because they have on long sleeves or cover their knees...but they don't have a clue what the spirit of the law of tznius is.

When I was pregnant I spent most of the 9 months on full bedrest but when I had to go to the doctor I wore loose tops and dresses, and later jumpers that dropped from the shoulders or even A line from the shoulders. I never felt fat in them and no one ever treated me, or other pregnant women, including friends of mine who worked through their whole pregnancies as doctors, nurses, accountants, lawyers, judges, teachers, secretaries, etc. with anything but total respect.

Pregnancy is something to be happy about, but a woman's body, whether pregnant or not, should not according to what tznius is, be "outlined". One should never see a bra line, a panty line, or the distinct outline of any part of one's body that should be covered by how you hold tznius. One should never wear clothing that pull over the chest, the hips, or are skin fitting down the arms from armpits down. One should never wear fabric that would show one's nipples clearly if they get hard from the cold, just like one should never wear a neckline that one can see down if one bends over. Just like one should never wear a skirt that is so tight that one wags one's backside when walking. That's just plain tznius.

So to answer, I'm one of those middle aged MO fuddy duddies who believes that women wearing anything outlining any of their body so much that it can be seen clearly - pregnant or not - look cheap, and not like a religious Jewish woman should look. It is totally not classy. I doubt that in any really high class office would one would see a high class executive woman wearing a spandex stomach hugging maternity top in which one could see the outline of her belly button.
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"Olam Chessed Yiboneh", Tehilim 89.

I neither intend to flaunt nor do I hide my baby bump. I choose maternity clothing that I'm comfortable in and that I think looks nice. Can you tell I'm pregnant through my clothing? Yes. It's difficult to hide an entire baby inside one's clothing. Do I wear skintight clothing to "flaunt" that baby? No. But I don't wear that kind of clothing even when I'm not pregnant - I don't think it's flattering for almost anyone.
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Platinum Member Joined: Mar 24 2008 Posts: 6528

LOL! In Israel Spandex is Love. Wink

That said, if a woman wears a top showing no difference between where her breasts are, and where her stomach is, she will look huge...

Right on, FS. I agree with every word, except that last paragraph about being a MO fuddy-duddy.

I am 45, but my baby is one year old. I did not look like a tent during my pregnancies, but neither did I look like my shirt was a sling carrying a basketball.

31

I am very slim and carry my pregnancies like huge basketballs in front with a ginormous belly button sticking out by my 4th month. B/c of the way I carry, even in size XL shirts (I normally wear a S) my belly and belly button are very very prominent. By my 8th month all of my tops are very tight. I hate the way it looks but I am at a loss how to dress normally. I tried buying Old Navy plus sized maternity but the shirts looked horrible and my belly was still sticking out ridiculously.

My philosophy is that this is how Hashem made me, anyone who has a problem with my hugely pregnant body and giant belly button monstrosity can take it up with Him.

Diamond Member Joined: Oct 26 2009 Posts: 2516

Gold Member Joined: Jul 14 2009 Posts: 2094

I'm 25, have 3 kids & agree w/ Friedasima

I think I wore flattering clothing. I was obviously pregnant & not trying to hide it, but I kept the standards of tzinyus I would at any other time. (& when my belly button stuck out I put a band-aid over it Wink

)

my friend once overheard a pg girl telling her friend that she can still fit into her reg clothes, my friend mumbled "yeah, but can she get out? I can practically see the baby's eye color!"

Gold Member Joined: Jun 01 2009 Posts: 2307

Executive Member Joined: Jun 26 2010 Posts: 364

Diamond Member Joined: Dec 21 2009 Posts: 3162

I guess my problem with this thread is the assumption that women get dressed with an agenda to flaunt something. If they do, then of course it's wrong and untzniyus. However, I think that anyone who has a life does not get dressed to flaunt. Especially if you are pregnant - does anyone really follow any fashion trends when pregnant? Especially by the end of pregnancy, all you need is to be covered and comfortable, and then you are counting days till this ordeal is over. Do I really care at this moment, what a random lady in the street "wants to see"? You bet I don't. I don't have anyone go home and change their clothes just for me, and I don't want to do that too.

If you have fat rolls or a popped bellybutton, then of course there is a problem. You look in the mirror and don't like what you see. You change into a looser shirt. However, there are women who have neither of those. They just look like a normal woman with a big smooth ball in the front. No extra details. What stops her from wearing a tighter shirt?

I believe tzniyus is very individual. There are flat chested slim women who can wear tightest shirts and still look tzniyusdik because there is just nothing to reveal. The same shirts on a curvier woman would look inappropriate. So there is no reason to put down certain styles just because they don't look good on some people, but not on the others.