HELP DD wont put bras in sleepaway camp laundry. Embarassed

OK so here us the situation. My DD is 14, wears sportsbras mostly, the ones that go over your head. She just informed me that she refuses to put "her undershirts" as she calls them, she wont even use the word bras, into the camp laundry. The way its done in camp is that everyones laundry is washed together, then retuened in bulk and everone sorts the stuff and takes theirs.

So what do I do?

Buy her 30 of them one for each day?
15 for every other day?
Buy less and have her smell?

I hear her, however I have no idea what to do.
Please advise me!

Tell her she should be more embarrassed NOT to put them in the laundry because:

1- she'll smell
2- She's 14, she'd be the only one in the bunk who "doesn't wear bras" (as she would like others to think) and the other girls would think it's weird.

That's a very embarrassing way to do laundry. I would hate it.
Can you get her a mesh bag with her name on it? She could put all her underwear and bras inside, and no one has to see every piece of laundry.

Or you can suggest that she washes them herself by hand while she's in the shower. Give her a small bottle of detergent.
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She's 14--she feels awkward, a tad embarrassed, etc. At her age, I would say "chest" instead of "breasts"--it just seemed weird, too grown-up, etc. So I see where's she's coming from!

Like Zus said, give her a small bottle of detergent and she can wash them in the sink. But will she then feel weird about hanging them up to dry? If she throws them back into her drawers, she'll get mold on them.....make sure she understands this.

Maybe you could send her up with a bunch of those sports bras (very cheap at Target and WalMart) and a big thing of Febreeze??

Gold Member Joined: Aug 24 2010 Posts: 1477

Mesh bag for underwear and tights. She can just grab her bag, and no one will know what's inside.

Gold Member Joined: Jun 01 2009 Posts: 2307

What a ridiculous way to do laundry. I think the mesh bag idea is great, and should probably be implemented for all the girls! If all the laundry is sorted together then I assume she'll see the bras of all the other girls after the first wash. That'll hopefully get rid of her embarrassment and she'll give hers in at the next wash. Unless she knows that everyone else wears one too but is still embarrassed. Or everyone is embarrassed and no one puts their in the wash Confused

Gold Member Joined: Aug 24 2010 Posts: 1477

but by the way, camp laundries (at least when I was in camp) put mesh bags in the dryer, and if the bags are too full, your stuff comes back wet. Have her leave them at least half empty if she wants her stuff to get dry.

I remember having a similar problem in camp. always struggling to hide my pads and the likes till I came to the realization that its nothing wrong and totally normal and part of being a girl. I saw many girls in camp that were totally open abt these things and it rubbed off on me, big time. im sure it'll rub off on her too with time.

Gold Member Joined: Dec 25 2008 Posts: 2034

my kid is in grade 7 and has been wearing a bra for over two years (pretty much once they got bigger than mosquito bites and showed through her shirts). She is 12.5. I have no doubt that she was not the only one at camp with bras. your daughter seems to be unusually weirded out by this, which is a totally natural thing. I think girls should be encouraged to be comfortable with their bodies, not ashamed of them. and she is not that young.

I agree with the mesh bag idea. it actually would save everyone a huge amount of trouble if all the underwear and bras and socks went in them. I am going to encourage my kid to do that this summer.

thanks all!

Youre all gonna love this...... BTW OP here

They dont let the mesh bag thing because everything is all bunched together and doesnt really get cleaned appropriately.

And this is a totally normal run of the mill camp!!!!

Maybe its just easier to buy her 15 sports bras and have her change evry other day???

oh well, the mesh bag wouldve been a good idea

I didnt go to camp, so I cant say what I wouldve done, but I think I wouldnt want my laundry washed like that

washing it whilst she is in the shower is a good idea

Buy her some concentrated laundry detergent so it won't take up so much room in her bag.

Buy her a few extra bras (not 15!!).

That way she'll have the option on hand-washing.

I'm sure she's not the only girl who is ot thrilled with the laundry arrangement. Maybe other parents can lobby for the mesh bag.

Okay, that's really odd that the camp won't allow mesh bags in the laundry.

I work at a camp and as it is the girls are loathe to claim their underwear and at the end of the summer we throw away tons (that gets left on the floor during clean up or something and is never claimed), but for laundry almost everyone puts their underwear in mesh bags. As previous posters pointed out, it's important that the bags be only half full, otherwise they won't dry.

Other than that (mesh bags), I have to agree with what the other posters pointed out, that at age 14 basically everyone has been wearing bras for years already and it shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Does she know any staff members (married staff or single staff?) that she can ask to do her laundry for/with her? Also, maybe you can send her up with 10 bras and come up on visiting day and wash them all so she'll have them all clean for the last two weeks of camp?

Good luck!

on this theme- any ideas about this one?
DD refuses to wear ANY sports bra. And she is 13.5 and NEEDS to. I've bought her some and she just keeps them in a drawer. She is developing terrible posture bc she hunches over all the time trying to hide it. HELP!

So maybe she'll feel more comfy with other types of bras? Maybe take her out on a mom-daughter shopping trip to a specialized lingerie store and have her pick out her own style.

Gold Member Joined: Jul 27 2009 Posts: 1187

what about getting her a tank top with bra built in (just thinking about this because this is what I wear for nursing) I am sure they make them for non nursing people. and that way it looks like a tank top and not a bra Smile

Senior Member Joined: Jan 23 2009 Posts: 121

buy her seven or eight, one for every other day until visiting day, and wash them for her then, at a laundromat or whatever

Platinum Member Joined: Aug 01 2005 Posts: 16895

Whom is she kidding???? shes 14??? all her classmates are wearing bras - who doesnt wear one by high school??? She wont be the only one!

Scondly, I'm surprised 14 yr olds still send their laundry to the camp. We washed our own laundry from age 12 & up.
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Platinum Member Joined: Aug 01 2005 Posts: 16895

Is there an adult staff member in the camp youre acquainted with? maybe she can give her bras to her to wash in her laundry so she doesnt feel 'embarrassed' in front of her friends, (which I dont get in the first place.)

I'll never forget,, the FIRST DAY OF MY LIFE GOING TO CAMP, I got my period. I was panicking, panicking, how to dispose of the pads without anyone noticing. and I was one of the first girls in my class who got her period. It was terrifying. I finally took one girl into confidence and asked her to bring me a paper bag from my locker. She was discreet and I thank her to this day.

It's hard to be a developing teen with no privacy.