Why do people announce their engagement on fb?

Someone in my immediate family got engaged and I didnt find out from her! someone that has an account on facebook told me she saw some pics of the chassan and kallah. So facebook is more important than family? Will facebook people go to her simchah? no! I had to get dressed and go and smile too! It's like her family dosn't exist while we have to be here for her.

Silver Member Joined: Feb 09 2009 Posts: 793

I think you're upset she didn't personally call you and you had to find out because she posted on fb!!
there is nothing wrong with posting on fb, its for people who are "not in close contact" with her that the announcement is for not for family member to find out (although yes it happens that family members find out this way)
Let me ask you when you got engaged did you call all the members of your family close and far to tell them or did your parents did? Usually the kallah tries to make contact with as many people as she can but really parents are there to help with phone calls.
Also its not about you but about her, but nonetheless you feel hurt she didn't have the courtesy to tell you when you had to actually go to the L'chaim: I wouldn't take it personally I lot goes on after someone is engaged (maybe you can remember those times too )

Hug

Platinum Member Joined: May 07 2008 Posts: 8963

When you say "immediate family" do you mean a sister, daughter, mother? Because that's what "immediate" family is. If this is the case, I agree that stinks. If by "immediate" family you mean "related by blood rather than marriage", that's something else. I wouldn't expect my third cousin twice removed to call me to announce her engagement.

Gold Member Joined: Dec 30 2008 Posts: 1154

I found out my SIL and brother had a baby because my cousin saw it on facebook and called to wish me mazal tov. But that's what happens when you live 6000 miles away and have a 7 hour time difference from the rest of your family.

When I got engaged and each time I had a baby, only the parents and parents-in-law got phone calls, and I assumed they would pass the good word onto all the siblings. Everyone else found out on onlysimchas (which was the preferred method of sharing good news back when I got engaged) or facebook.
_________________
The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

Don't be offended if you find out via OnlySimchas. Sometimes siblings or friends of the couple post without their knowledge or permisssion. I found out my best friend's dc was engaged when I saw it on OS. My friend knew nothing about the announcement; a friend of the kallah's had posted the announcement, without permission and against their wishes, before the future machatonim had even finished saying "Lechaim". The engagement was literally a few minutes old when I saw the announcement.

Yes, my friend contacted OS and had the announcement removed.