Pacifiers, waitng until the kid gives it up!

Executive Member Joined: May 25 2010 Posts: 327

My 1.5 yr old and 3 yr old still use pacifiers at night and a little by day when needed. Im getting ALOT of critisism about this from absaloutly everyone and anyone who notices. I feel strongly against taking away this comfort from them. especially since im pregnant, overwhelmed and cannot always be there for them as much as I would like. I think its just cruel. Sooo, being as I dont know anyone irl who sees my point of veiw im just wondering if im completly weird/ neglectful/ stupid, or if there are some imamothers out there who agree with me Smile

Diamond Member Joined: Apr 18 2010 Posts: 3102

When are you due? Whether or not you were right to let it get to this point, if you're within a month or 2 of your due date, definitely don't impose any major transitions on the kids. Wait till after the baby.

Platinum Member Joined: Feb 20 2009 Posts: 7949

Just at night? Totally fine, as far as I'm concerned, at that age. During the day, I limit it to very sporadic occasions- like when getting shots, a bad boo boo, stuff like that. Don't wean just because everyone else wants you to- your kids are ok, you are the mommy and you know best.

You don't have to wait forever, but it doesn't sound like now is the best time to wean. Go with your gut.

Gold Member Joined: Jul 02 2010 Posts: 1851

my two year old sleeps with a pacie, and the first thing she does in the morning is take it out and give it to me. she knows its only for shluf, and some very rare other occasions (shots, long trips in the car, extra kvetchy moments) I dont see anything wrong with it. I think there IS something wrong with big kids walking around all day with a pacie, but I dont really see how this is different than a security blanket that is only for sleeping.

Silver Member Joined: May 29 2008 Posts: 769

I have a 2 1/2 year old who also only uses his paci to sleep. He went to the dentist recently and she said it looks like some of his teeth were moving around b/c of the paci. Apparently he sucks on it really hard to keep it in his mouth. So we're trying to wean him off it. We also discovered it was the wrong size, so we got the right size until he gives it up.

If the dentist had said nothing, however, I would have no problem with him continuing to use his paci to sleep at least until 3. So as others said, you're the mother. You know how much your kids "need" the pacis, and how it's affecting them. As long as you're comfortable with it, don't let others make you second-guess yourself.

Gold Member Joined: Mar 23 2005 Posts: 1746

One of my kids gave it up at 5, another at 4. So far we have no paci related mouth issues.

Executive Member Joined: May 25 2010 Posts: 327

Thanks all for your support. I really dont know anyone irl who allows their kids to have it past their 1st bday so its good to hear im not alone on this issue. And as one of you said, I AM the mother so I do get to decide, not all the nosy freinds, relatives and babysitters.

Executive Member Joined: Nov 28 2010 Posts: 357

I took away the paci from my 3 year old soon after his birthday. He was really attached to it, generally used it only at nighttime, but I felt that I had to do it as some point!! Also, his speech is very unclear, and I wasn't sure if that was effecting it. But, he's also been miserable lately. He often comes into my bed and I think he has nightmares. I don't know if it was the best idea...
With my older son, I had taken it away a few months before he was 3, no prob.
It really depends on the kid. If he's really attached and you want to take it away, see if you can substitute with another comfort item.

Senior Member Joined: Aug 01 2011 Posts: 120

my daughter is 3 and after going to the dentist - who made a big deal about it bc she has a big overbite- we took it away last week. she only used it for sleeping. im still having a hard time Sad

the first two nights were hysterical crying and then she was perfect for a week and now we're back to I want my pacifier crying at night. I wish I could let her have it but her teeth were pretty bad its in her mouth all night. if its not doing anything major to ur kids teeth then I would let them have it. I used to pull it out after she went to sleep and put it on the floor but she just got out of bed and put it right back in.

Active Poster Joined: Dec 07 2009 Posts: 56

I never took away a paci from my kids, they were so addicted to it , I thought the day will never come but it did. they both gave it up on their own without me saying anything at 4 yrs old they decided theyre big. The first night when they couldnt fall asleep I even asked them if they want a lick they both said no I'm big.

my 3 yr old had dental surgery done recently and the dentist told me that the child will give it up when they're ready and I shouldnt take it away. he also said that the overbite will be rectified when the permanent teeth come in.

Senior Member Joined: Aug 01 2011 Posts: 120

guess my dentist thought differently. truth is I think my dd was 'getting ready' bc she talked about it all day that she doesn't want it but at night she changed her mind. it was cute my dd and I 'mailed' her pacifier to the dentist- put it in an envelope and everything and she was so proud... until bedtime came around...

Gold Member Joined: Sep 22 2009 Posts: 1787

I have a four year old who still uses the paci mostly at night, sometimes during the day but only at home or in the car.
I wouldn't dream of taking it away from her. She is talking about giving it up and I will wait untill she doesn't want ot anymore.

ckk, I don't think you're doing anything wrong. My son is 3 and still uses a paci, but only for sleeping.