Daughter being Bullied

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 4:33 pm Post subject: Daughter being Bullied

I need some really good advice. My daughter is in her 3rd school so far, one school she was in wasn't teaching properly so I took her out and put her in a different one which closed last year. She is now in a 3rd school and is being bullied.

She is 8 years old and the girls just don't stop! I don't know what to do. She is going to the social worker once a week, she is a sweet, sensitive and caring girl who runs to help others. Her regular teacher had a baby so now there is a sub. I asked her to call me twice already and have not heard from her.

My dd was balling her eyes out last night and wants me to take her out of the school. I can switch her class for next year but then that means she is getting switched again.

Why are girls so mean? Why do they let this go on in school? Why is nobody watching what is going on? The school she is in is supposed to be the best in Brooklyn right now and the learning is fantastic. They have many different programs for all different levels of learning and she is learning alot more then she did in the other schools. The major problem is that socially she is doing horrible which does affect scholastically.

I need advice quick! I tried to reach the principle but she is unreachable I left 2 messages for her already. I just asked the secretary to please call her cell phone!

If anyone ever went through this please give me some good advice. I have been helping her personally and been teaching her what to say to girls that start up with her.

Thank you!

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:06 pm Post subject: re: Daughter being Bullied

Anyone?

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:32 pm Post subject: re: Daughter being Bullied

ok, you have to prioritize here.

she's asking to switch. let her switch. there is no problem with switching in the beginning of the year, and she obviously doesn't get along with her current classmates. don't make her stay.

about the sub--
subs aren't regular teachers. she may not know who your daughter is. she probably has no control over the kids' behavior. I doubt the sub is interested in calling you.

the principal--
if you can't reach her by phone, walk into her office one day. you'll feel better having dealt with this.

now, about how to deal with it. you need to give names. I was bullied as a kid. two particular girls liked to make fun of me, and I sat between them. they were best friends. I came home crying one day, and my parents sent the teacher a note explaining exactly who was doing what. my seat was switched, the girls were made to apologize, and though we were never friends, they were never mean to me again. name names and make a fuss. it's your job. you say this is a bunch of girls, so this may not be so simple for you. if talking doesn't work, insist that the principal move your child to a different class NOW. an eight-year-old is not learning something so specific that she can't handle switching classrooms. she wants to switch anyway, just do it. I suspect she'll be a lot happier, even with having to make up some work.

is there a guidance counselor in the school? I know of at least one school in brooklyn that has one for elementary school, but very few people are aware of her presence. if there is one, request that she do a workshop with ALL the girls explaining what bullying is and what it means to be bullied. you can also request that the parents of the bullies be notified that their consent is needed for a private session for their kids with the guidance counselor. the school can do that. if the kids get in trouble with their parents, they may change overnight. it happens sometimes.

I feel for your daughter. I hope you can work this out quickly.

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:34 pm Post subject: re: Daughter being Bullied

I'm sorry I don't have words of wisdom. I think you need to give people time to respond to threads.
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Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:47 pm Post subject: re: Daughter being Bullied

My dd has given names, she is speaking with the social worker, I am hesitatnt to switch her class as she has 3 friends in the class one being a very good friend. I guess I will give her the choice and see what she wants. I got the principle's cell phone # I will call her now. Thanks.

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:48 pm Post subject: Re: re: Daughter being Bullied

Posted: Thu, Apr 07 2011, 5:55 pm Post subject: re: Daughter being Bullied

It is the school social worker, I don't know whom she spoke to, I asked her to speak to them and I also called them. The english principle I spoke to but not the Hebrew. I am waiting to speak with her. I also called another organization and left a message for a private social worker, I hope something works out soon.

Please keep suggestions coming.