I'm losing my mind!!! Help with 2 yo

Op here -
An update, b"h since starting this thread, I have been following all of your advice and life has changed as we know it. No, the tantrums have not stopped completely, he had one around breakfast time, but I didn't give in and it was over fast. No hitting since. I'm also only going out with him once/day and it's for a very short time to get some essentials (like fruit or dinner or whatever). No more Target. No more library. No more walking with mommy on the street, he has to be in a stroller. Several crafts every day. This morning we went out very early to the supermarket, bought for shabbos (it was right after breakfast and still early enough that he was fine). He said, "no more," and we left. Care seat issues, MUCH better, again no perfect, but I don't give in for one second and the entire time I'm speaking in a calm voice.

We came home did a drawing with markers and stickers for his great grandmother and then called her on the phone. Read a bunch of books, played with his baby and he went in for a nap. He still woke up too early. We pushed bedtime back to 7:30 and he still woke up at 6:15. I don't know what to do about that.

Next thread.... Smile

On another note. As of last night he's going to a new babysitter (a huge issue and thing happened) so we'll see how it goes. I'm nervous that he'll tantrum with someone new but I don't have a choice today because today is my first day of class. But, this is my friend's babysitter and a lot of people in the neighborhood use her, so we'll see.

Thanks for listening and the advice.

Senior Member Joined: Feb 03 2006 Posts: 191

on the topic of tantrums
is this considered giving in to a tantrum.

This happens often I put on my toddlers shirt on or any clothes, and she freaks out cause she wants to do it alone
I say "no problem just tell mommy that" and I take it off and let her do it alone
This plays out in a alot of similar situations

another example I put her in the bath and she freaks out cuz she wanted to go in alone
so I take her out and let her go in alone( I let her know she should just tell mommy)

or I pour cereal into her bowl and she wanted to
recently ive been very careful I usually ask her who should do it?

ceetee, I think that depends on the situation. if she's doing what you want her to do, I don't think it's giving in, it's just hard for her to communicate.

Platinum Member Joined: Nov 30 2006 Age: 28 Posts: 8702

ceetee, what I do in this case is say, "I can't understand you when you don't talk properly." And that's it. If they continue to cry and scream about this issue instead of rephrasing politely, I tell them again, "I can't understand when you scream. Tell me calmly and I'll listen."
And they do. Smile

I wouldn't do what she asks when she's freaking out. Instead of just telling her that all she has to do is ask, have her actually repeat her request.
_________________

Platinum Member Joined: Aug 12 2007 Posts: 20487

OP, Rome wasn't built in a day. Tantrums are his learned way of behaving, and it will take time to unlearn that mode of behavior. What you are doing is great. The only thing I don't understand is all these craft projects with a 2 yo boy.... I don't know any boys of that age who will sit long enough for that every day. Is there any reason that he's not at a park for at least 1.5 - 2 hours/day? Riding his trike? Playing ball? It's a great way to burn energy.
Regarding the wake-up time, 6:15 doesn't sound so bad. It means you have to get up earlier, but he's getting a good night's sleep, going to bed at a decent hour... Nothing wrong there. Maybe you will just have to go to sleep earlier and then start your day earlier with him.
Yasher koach on your willingness to make a change. It's not easy!

that means he isnt happy and something is bothering him. I think u should read what to expect the toddler years and how tomtalk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk.

Diamond Member Joined: Aug 26 2007 Posts: 4037

ceetee, so good you give your toddler choices.

op, I was thinking of you when my little man dumped cookie dough all over the floor this morning! Laughing

OP here - B"H life has changed as we know it.

As for the crafts - ds LOVES them. He's not sitting for an hour, it's like 5-10 minutes. And I'm the one who says, no more let's play, and he says no, "more, more." He won't get up until he's done. When he says, no more, that's it.

He loves stickers and stamps and markers and crayons, etc. Maybe he'll be like his cousin and uncle who are amazing artists. Though from his early work I doubt it Smile

But he really likes it.

Rome was def. not built in a day, but things are soooo much better it's amazing.

I'm so happy for you!

Platinum Member Joined: Aug 12 2007 Posts: 20487