Seating guests

Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 1:29 pm Post subject: seating guests

when you have a couple over for a shabbos meal without kids who sit at the table, how do you seat everyone?

right now, its just me and my husband at the shabbos table, and when I invite couples over, I'm never sure whats the appropriate way to seat everyone...
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Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 1:29 pm Post subject: re: seating guests

I would allow people to seat where they want.
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Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 1:36 pm Post subject: re: seating guests

I would seat the guy next to your husband on either side, and his wife right next to him, and you sit next to your husband on the other side.

Moderator Joined: Dec 26 2005 Age: 33 Posts: 11430

DH and I show people where we sit and then tell our guests that they can sit where they want.

Platinum Member Joined: May 06 2007 Posts: 8518

Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 1:47 pm Post subject: re: seating guests

Cindy us too Wink

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

I seat ppl where I think they'd be comfortable, and my kids not fight, and then I ask if that's ok with them.

Diamond Member Joined: Apr 29 2006 Posts: 4774

actually as a guest I'd rather be seated. When pple say seat yourselves where'd ud like, there is this awkward
few minutes of figuring it out (it's not like we figured it all out before hand and we wonder if perhaps u did) especially awkward if it is many guests, most of whom don't know each other.

I say seat them the way you'd like, most pple will be ok wiht most arrangements, keeping in mind 1)ur kids/or thier kids 2)nidda laws (no bench and yes I had that problem in many a succah) 3)near someone they know or can talk to 4) if it's a first time I think seat spouses near each other for sure 5)the woman will probably get up to help so put her ina place where it's comfortable to get up and got o the kitchen.
these are just some ideas though
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Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

Guess who mostly gets seated at the kiddie table !!!

Gold Member Joined: Jan 25 2007 Posts: 1351

Husband at head of table, you next to him on one side, the guest husband next to him on the other side, and guest wife nest to guest husband.

Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 7:26 pm Post subject:

Problem with the suggestions here is that if the ladies want to discuss something other than what the men are talking about, they have to do it across the table so I would usually seat the lady next to me.
This still doesn't solve the whole problem because it means that the lady of the house gets to sit opposite someone else's dh. Not comfortable.

Some people's minhag (chassidish?) is that the lady of the house sits opposite her dh at the other end of the table. Then the guest can sit next to dh and his wife sits next to you at the other end, but still next to her dh (obviously not a looong table).
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Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 7:29 pm Post subject: re: seating guests

Diamond Member Joined: Dec 04 2006 Posts: 2694

Ribbie, I think it's a yekkish minhag iirc.
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Executive Member Joined: Sep 07 2006 Posts: 481

At home, I always sit next to DH and I seat my guests accordingly. If it's couples, I seat the husband and wife next to each other. If it's singles, I do girls on one side of table and boys on other side. When it's my DH's family, his father sits next to him (opposite me), my MIL next to FIL, then my BIL's (all single) around the table (including next to me).

When we are guests by someone else, I really prefer to sit next to DH, unless we are going to someone's house that I know very well (like a good friend of mine), otherwise I get uncomfortable.
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Diamond Member Joined: Apr 29 2006 Posts: 4774

my parents did it that way so that there was a parent at each end controlling the masses

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

LA, cool new Avatar !!!!

Posted: Tue, Jan 01 2008, 7:43 pm Post subject: Re: re: seating guests

Diamond Member Joined: Apr 29 2006 Posts: 4774

Thanks CM, I was getting bored of myself.

Breslov, sorry I didnt read ur post carefully and my answer was really very generic, but in ur specific case, I say husband and wife next to each other with husband nest to yours, you across from them, next to your husband.

Once my SIL invited us over and sat DH and I next to each other and her and my brother across from us. We were both a nidda and the non passing/passing situation was hysterical. In such a sitch I think it would been more comfortable seated differntly

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

many ppl don't seat spouses together.

Gold Member Joined: Jan 25 2007 Posts: 1351