Irreligious girl in camp with DD

amother

Sun, Jun 24 2007, 4:57 pm

I'm sending my daughter to camp this summer because there are no frum teens her age in my area. Sleeping arrangements in the camp are two per room. Here's the problem: My daughter has an irreligious friend who's also going to the camp and wants to bunk with my daughter. I'd rather she doesn't. I want my daughter to be with another frum jew.
The irreligious girl's dad is not even jewish, I think they celebrate x-mas. I think the reason she's going is because she wants to become more jewish, however, I'm afraid she's a bad influence. Throughout the year, I can keep an eye on them, but if they'll be together in camp..........
Any ideas or suggestions would be very helpful. Thank You.

Ruchel

Sun, Jun 24 2007, 5:02 pm

For security and chinuch reasons I'm not so much for camps.
If you cannot find her another room, I would say do not send her.

SingALong

Sun, Jun 24 2007, 8:52 pm

can you talk to someone in the camp? maybe say that you want your daughter to broaden her horizons and room with someone new so that she can make new friends? so as not to sound degrating to this girl?

greenfire

Mon, Jun 25 2007, 11:33 am

haven't you taught your daughter to be strong in her convictions ... the world has influences at large ... perhaps your dd will influence her friend after all you said that is why the girl is going to camp ...

DefyGravity

Mon, Jun 25 2007, 11:43 am

Your daughter will still be around this girl even if they don't room together. . . so the girl can still get her clutches into your daughter.

Furthermore, you don't know who else they could stick her with. You never know what influences she's going to come in contact with.

sarahd

Mon, Jun 25 2007, 12:25 pm

But there's a difference if a girl is "around" or if she is rooming together with your daughter - late-night talks, confidences, etc.

Nicole

Mon, Jun 25 2007, 12:33 pm

How old is your daughter? A teenager gets a lot of pleasure out of being "mikarev" someone- although I do agree with you that she should have someone older and wiser in camp to be able to speak about this irriligous friend with. Do you know someone who can keep an eye on the sitch and make sure your daughter is doing ok?

Mrs.Norris

Wed, Jun 27 2007, 3:50 pm

the girl is going to a religious camp so she can be more religious and you're worried about the bad influences she may have? Why don't you encourage your daughter to tell her about the beauty of everything you do, this girl isn't out to sway your daughter to the 'bad side' she just wants to learn more why arn't you encouraging your daughter to teach her and I'm sorry but if your daughter is so easily influenced it's something you should be working on as there are SO many influences, least of your worries should be one teenage friend of your daughters.

justanothermother

Wed, Jun 27 2007, 4:05 pm

It is wonderful to try and be mekarev an irreligious girl, but some teenagers are not strong enough to resist the pull. If your daughter is the type to have a strong curiosity about what is "out there" or has in the past tried to push the line, spending night after night with this girl can do a lot of harm. She can get an "education" that you can't even imagine. I agree with sarahd. I would only allow it if your daughter is the type to never question and has a very strong foundation of emunah. But in your post you mention you are already worried about the influence.

greenfire

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 9:34 am

sometimes frum girls in camp/schools are actually looking out for the "bad influences" - rebel without a cause ...

amother

Fri, Jul 06 2007, 1:44 pm

I got a real "education" at camp as a teen and made freindships that were very bad for me. You are right to be nervous!