Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts: How much do you spend on non-family?

Now that my children are approaching that age, the invitations come pouring in, how much do you spend on a bar/bat mitzvah gift? What do you spend if only the child is invited and what do you spend if the parents are invited too?

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48155

For coworkers or ppl you see all the time, you might want to give a gift ... or even spend more. I can't say I always give though . . .

BUT when DD's friends became "that age", I went online - to ebay, it was 6 years ago, and found a place to get (bulk) silver earrings and each friend got the exact same thing.

The boys each chipped in $ for a Rambam, and they gave that to each kid.

Silver Member Joined: Dec 13 2006 Posts: 833

How much do you give as a Bar Mitzva present to a first cousin's child or close friend's child. Same for wedding. Is $18 now cosidered too little for a Bar Mitzvah gift and what is average for a wedding gift in Crown Heights or other similar neighborhood? Any thoughts??

Crown Heights is notorious for not giving gifts. For classmates I agree with the previous post. Most kids give jewelry or something like that. For Bar or bat mitzvahs that we are invited to, if at a hall and catered we usually give $150 -$180.
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Silver Member Joined: Dec 13 2006 Posts: 833

Hey Brooklyn: Us Crown Heightsers DO GIVE gifts, although they may be modest compared to yours. Just don't want to make my gifts too modest.

Funny, had forty girls from CH at my wedding, had many couples as well. Could count the number of gifts on one hand. Granted that was years ago. Maybe things have changed.