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| coffee girl |
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Active Poster


Joined: Jul 06 2010 Posts: 60
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Posted: Mon, Jun 25 2012, 10:39 pm Post subject: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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what do you do with your one month old sc when he/she is up during the day?
my dd is 4 weeks old and she definitely is more awake during the day. I put her in the swing but that doesn't last more than 10 min (if she doesnt fall asleep by then). I can't just hold her until she falls asleep... what do you do?
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| MaBelleVie |
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Platinum Member


Joined: Feb 20 2009 Posts: 7956
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Posted: Mon, Jun 25 2012, 10:43 pm Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| Either hold her, or put her in the carrier. Sometimes they are ok in a stroller, bouncy seat type of thing, or lying in the crib watching a mobile. It depends on the baby's personality- see what yours likes.
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| ra_mom |
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Joined: Dec 09 2008 Posts: 18531 Location: NY
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Posted: Mon, Jun 25 2012, 10:43 pm Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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can you wear her in a baby carrier? _________________ Really Awesome Mom!
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| Bliss |
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Joined: Dec 21 2008 Age: 27 Posts: 1519
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Posted: Mon, Jun 25 2012, 10:58 pm Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| I don't have much advice but I remember with my first I had such an experience. She took quick naps and was awake much of the day and crying. I used to hold her a a lot. I remember doing my supper with her in my hand. But believe me, it'll pass.
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| spring13 |
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Joined: May 09 2010 Posts: 2158
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Posted: Mon, Jun 25 2012, 11:06 pm Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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I kind of had stations. Swing/bouncer, a playmat on the floor with dangly thing to look at, and the baby carrier. If your baby is kvetchy and needs to be cuddled, but you need to do something with your hands, a baby carrier is definitely a good investment. _________________ http://crunchyandkosher.blogspot.com/
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| coffee girl |
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Joined: Jul 06 2010 Posts: 60
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 8:02 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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thank you every one for your replies
a carrier is not an option - id rather hold her and do things with one hand. I just hope this is not setting me up for a spoiled baby who won't ever go down!
I set up last night the mobile for her bassinet... I'll try it later. if she likes it, maybe it's time to buy a playmat.
Bliss, you said it'll pass. how long did the stage last by you?
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| m in Israel |
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Joined: Jun 12 2011 Posts: 792
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 8:19 am Post subject: Re: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| coffee girl wrote: | thank you every one for your replies
a carrier is not an option - id rather hold her and do things with one hand. I just hope this is not setting me up for a spoiled baby who won't ever go down!
I set up last night the mobile for her bassinet... I'll try it later. if she likes it, maybe it's time to buy a playmat.
Bliss, you said it'll pass. how long did the stage last by you? |
It is impossible to "spoil" a one month old -- responding to his needs as fast as you can is what teaches him that there is a responsive, secure world out there, leading to more independence in the future, not less. However, you can definitely experiment with getting him used to other ways of entertaining himself. A playmat is a good idea, but the first bunch of times he may only be happy if you are sitting next to him and talking/ playing with him. Once he gets used to it you may be able to leave him a bit more on his own (with you still supervising, obviously, but not necessarily on the floor next to him.) Keep in mind that if he sleeps on his back he may not be so happy on his tummy, so a playmat with toys above him is worth it.
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| Chavelamomela |
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Joined: Jul 02 2010 Posts: 1416
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 8:34 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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I don't understand why you are against wearing the baby in a carrier. You'll have your hands free, if it's a good carrier your back won't hurt, and the baby will be comforted by your close presence. There's no such thing as "spoiling" a baby - things get spoiled when they're left alone to rot, not kept closely and cherished, responded to quickly, and nourished.
There are so many wonderful babywearing carriers available these days. Try a sling, pouch, ergo, mei tei, wrap, or anything that suits your fancy.
Babies were not born to be left alone. They tend to feel soothed and comforted with close to mom (remember, she was inside you for 9 months!), can smell you and can relax in your arms/close to you.
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| mommyhood |
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Joined: Jun 21 2010 Posts: 848
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 9:10 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| I basically held my babies for the first 6 weeks, after that they started to calm down. I tried a few different carriers but hated all of them, and my babies didn't like them either. Definitely get a playmat, the baby needs something to look at when their on the floor.
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| coffee girl |
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Joined: Jul 06 2010 Posts: 60
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 9:14 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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ok, so the word "spoil" was the wrong word. I meant to ask how to avoid "setting the stage" for the future - that I can never put her down and leave her down if she's crying
I love my little princess and I love holding her, it's just that at times it gets too much, especially when I need to do things around the house...
I guess I should look into a carrier, but in the meantime a playmat is a great option (she does sleep on her back)
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| Chavelamomela |
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Joined: Jul 02 2010 Posts: 1416
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 10:10 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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There's no "setting the stage" - babies are born and their only way to communicate their needs is by crying. Responding to them quickly teaches them that they can depend on you and allows them to be in a calm state more often. Babies who are less stressed have lower cortisol levels and they tend to thrive.
Obviously as your baby grows into a toddler and older child with a personality of her own you will be able to say "no" and redirect her, but infancy is not the time to worry about that.
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| gp2.0 |
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Joined: Jan 11 2010 Age: 25 Posts: 3725 Location: Nerdfighteria Island
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 10:21 am Post subject: |
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Swaddling was magic for me. I recommend it to everyone. _________________ "Don't turn your back. Don't look around. And don't blink. Good luck." -The Doctor
'Age is foolish and forgetful when it underestimates youth.' -Dumbledore
Novel Edits: 650/54,700...I don't even want to figure out that percentage.
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| YESHASettler |
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Joined: Nov 21 2005 Age: 41 Posts: 14677 Location: YESHA, Israel
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 10:23 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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OP, you don't actually specify what the problem is, other than the baby is 'up'... if she's not fussing, leave her in her carriage/playpen/crib/playmat/bouncy seat.
If she is fussy, babywearing is the way to go. _________________
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| ElTam |
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Joined: Aug 14 2005 Posts: 4703 Location: Ohio
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 10:34 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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My first baby was very high-needs. If it hadn't been for a baby carrier, I would have lost my mind. I did everything with her in it except cook at the stove and take a shower. _________________ mommy to 2 girls, 1 boy
"I would rather have my people laugh at my economies than weep for my extravagance."
--King Oscar of Sweden
"Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"
--Wash
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| StrongIma |
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Joined: Sep 16 2007 Posts: 4185
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 10:37 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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I would think this is quite normal in the first 2 - 3 months of life. (That may seem like a long time to you right now, but a year form now, you may not even remember this stage at all.) _________________ The results of our actions are not up to us or even necessarily a direct consequence of them. The only thing that's really in our power is our perspective, that everything that happens is for the (our) good.
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| sky |
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Joined: Mar 24 2008 Posts: 6528
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 11:29 am Post subject: |
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| gp2.0 wrote: | | Swaddling was magic for me. I recommend it to everyone. |
this. Swaddling was a life saver for me. my babies slept longer and deeper.
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| black sheep |
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Joined: Jan 14 2011 Posts: 2825
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 11:41 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| the more you hold her now, the happier she will be now and later. hold her as much as you can. if you need to do other things (and who doesn't?) put her down near you in a swing or car seat and talk to her the whole time. if she is very fussy, the best thing is a baby carrier. and there is no such thing as training a baby to not be held. think of it as training a baby to think they are alone in the world. why would you want to do that?
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| Ruchel |
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Joined: Apr 21 2006 Age: 28 Posts: 43339 Location: Nak, Teton County
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 11:59 am Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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My first loved swaddling, not my second...
Am I the only one who gets horribly hot with a sling?? _________________
"You will have many many children and make successful shidduchim beh", rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
"It's all cultural, disagree respectfully", me
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| enneamom |
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Gold Member


Joined: Dec 02 2009 Posts: 1687 Location: The Owlery
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 3:22 pm Post subject: Re: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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| StrongIma wrote: | | I would think this is quite normal in the first 2 - 3 months of life. (That may seem like a long time to you right now, but a year form now, you may not even remember this stage at all.) |
I second this. In the beginning you don't really get anything done; the focus is on the baby and that's how it should be. Especially if you're going back to work soon. Even more than "filling your freezer", it's important to fill your child up with tender care and close contact. Studies have shown that early direct contact leads to higher IQ and other benefits, so invest now for the future.
Just try to delegate as much as you can, and cherish these precious early months with baby! You'll never get them back again. _________________ "Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten."
- G.K. Chesterton
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| coffee girl |
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Joined: Jul 06 2010 Posts: 60
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Posted: Tue, Jun 26 2012, 5:53 pm Post subject: re: hold baby the whole day?!! |
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Thank you all for your input.
Just please don't think I'm a bad mom, I'm "learning on the job" and was just asking for advice....
If all you experienced moms say this is a normal stage and it will pass, then I will definitely do my best to enjoy it [and ignore the unfolded laundry and other such things]
Thank you again!
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