Someone overstepped her bounds

Posted: Tue, May 15 2012, 7:25 pm Post subject: Someone overstepped her bounds

DH and I share an account for work. He takes care of most of the messages, but occasionally I go through and organize and delete them. Not too often, and there aren't too many in this account anyway, so it really doesn't require much upkeep.

Anyway, today I found a message to him, saying that some of my Facebook posts show signs of depression and that I should be on medication if I am not already, and I if I am then it should be changed. She said some people put out messages as a cry for help, and that she didn't want to ignore it.

I was shocked! A. I am not even close to this person. B. I am certainly not depressed. C. What right does someone think they have to contact another women's husband? I mean, a close friend maybe, but someone who barely even knows me?

I went back to that date on my Facebook. I found that I had written a sad face that it would have been my dad's birthday and it was a sad day. (He passed away last year) People write that stuff all the time. There were a few comments from close friends and relatives offering love and support, and were greatly appreciated. I went back a few days before that, and there were some funny posts about the kids, one about enjoying some quiet time after sending the kids outside, another about a kitchen mishap that turned out OK in the end. The only other "sad" posts were from a couple weeks before that on my dad's 1st yahrtzeit and for the few days after that I wasn't feeling well. There were tons of happy posts about Purim, and tons of pictures of the kids!

Other than that nothing that could even be considered "depressed". My friends and I all have bad days and write silly posts from time to time....a kid staying up too late, a kid doing something dumb, etc.

Back to this woman: dh of course didn't respond to her and never even mentioned anything to me.

Should I do anything? There were no other messages from her. I don't need my posts being analyzed by someone who barely even knows me or my family!

Silver Member Joined: Aug 03 2008 Posts: 692

Remove her from your friend's list. What a ridiculous thing. While you're at it why don't you remove people who arent really your friends or that you dont know too well and hopefully avoid this in the future.

Executive Member Joined: Jan 16 2011 Posts: 305

that sounds very weird to me, like the post above, delete her from your friend list.

in todays world where we have facebook lines are blurred. People share WAY TOO MUCH information with the rest of the world and think it's okay.

personally I was on facebook, someone "crossed the line" (a male said hi to me when he wouldn't have without facebook) and I canceled my account.

I've had someone who has a minor minor minor social relationship with me ask "if everything was okay" because I was out to dinner without my dh. I dont hold it against him, I just laugh at it because it is so off base. I know he meant well and I let it fly off of my shoulder. My dh and I use it as a joke now, like if I ask him to get out of bed and get me a cup of water and he says no, I'll say that I'll call up this person and tell him we're having marital problems.

I dont see any value in doing anything about it, just forget about it.

something similar happened to me. A college friend of Dhs came to visit, when DS was just a baby. I got a little fed up at some of her attitudes, but put up with her.

A few weeks later I happen to be going in DHs computer for something else and saw an email from her saying that she was worried I had PPD (DS was 18 months) because I didnt want to watch the same tv show as her, and she question my parenting style and insinuated that since she had a friend once wqith PPD who cheated on her husband, that my DH had to be careful to make sure I didnt cheat on him
_________________
~Rebecca
NYM 6/11/2004 Music

LTR 6/25/2009 Lady

"Knowledge works best when shared"

I deleted my facebook account for various reasons and after I have done that I felt that I was really addicted to it.
We live in a smallish community where you don�t socialize to much but write a loooot of things on facebook.
I find it redicilous anyway but first of all it�s dangerous because long after you forget what you wrote, your "friends" or facebook history doesn�t.
I now keep in touch by mail which is much more personal or by phone.
It took a lot of support from my dh though to get off facebook.
I am so happy I dont noisy "friends" with detail from my personal life.

Platinum Member Joined: May 07 2008 Posts: 8963

Ignore it. No point in pursuing the matter unless this person starts to stalk or harrass you.
Now you know why some people don't join facebook or other social networking sites.