When Shabbos comes in around dinner time/bed time

Executive Member Joined: Oct 13 2010 Posts: 280

Any tips on how to manage without pushing off the meal or bedtime??
It doesn't matter how early we start making Shabbos, DH and I are always rushing at the last minute to finish everything and meal time/bed time (depending on what time Shabbos comes in) almost always gets pushed off, which isn't right.
All tips are appreciated!! Very Happy

my kids always stay up for kiddush and then go to bed.

I don't think a kid going to bed a little late once a week is going to ruin their schedule. My kids are fine with this.

Diamond Member Joined: Dec 21 2009 Posts: 3193

I serve the food that I cooked for seuda earlier, when they are hungry. Then they stay up for kiddush and challah, and we put them to bed in between courses, depending on how tired I am. They usually nap on friday but when they don't I put them down for sure and keep on belated schedule throughout the weekend.

Gold Member Joined: Jul 15 2011 Posts: 1012

I know its not easy, but I try and have all the major/most things done before kids regular supper time. Then from then on, I can focus on the kids routine till bedtime. We give them shabbos food as their supper.

If possible my husband will be finishing off getting ready while I am doing supper, then takes over for bedtime while I do last minute things and light.

My kids are still little but I imagine in a year or so we will start keeping our oldest or oldest 2 up for kiddish, challa and chicken soup. (They have their normal supper earlier but stay up for the experience) My children are usually very tired at this point (we have done it once or twice before) and usually dont touch the chicken soup and ask to go up to bed. Which works out all round.

Diamond Member Joined: Dec 21 2009 Posts: 3193

My challenge is havdala so late, since they have regular school hours every Sunday. I try to put my youngest to bed before Shabbos ends, but he isn't so happy about this.

My kids are 4 and 5, and when the clocks changed I was all idealistic about how now they're really old enough to notice if they go to bed before shabbat, and how I want them at the table for kiddush and the meal-

well after a few weeks in a row of them staying up 2 hours later than bedtime for the meal, I'm singing a different tune Smile

They were absolutely CRAZY during the meal, for some reason this would be the wildest they get all week, to the point that not only were they not sitting at the table, but I wasn't either cuz I kept jumping up to break up fights, steer them away from rooms I didn't want them in etc.

THEN, since they went to sleep late but still wake up at normal time they fall apart midday shabbos afternoon and if I were to let them nap the cycle would start all over, as a nap would push off bedtime by at least a couple of hours.

sooo now I put my guilty feelings away, get them to bed before candlelighting (at least my little one, my older one sometimes will stay up and I'll put him to bed while dh is at shul) and dh and I get to relax and enjoy a quiet romantic dinner Smile

as for the logistics- dh does last minute tidying up/setting up plata/candlesticks, sweeping etc while I get them dinner, give baths and put them to sleep...

Executive Member Joined: Oct 13 2010 Posts: 280

Whoa...you all make it sound so easy!!! Shocked

Hopefully one day I can sound that way too!!
Also, what do you do about younger kids who either need to be fed, or else need to be constantly supervised to make sure they actually eat?
When my kids get older, I'm sure that it will be so much easier, but for now mealtime means that I need to be with them, helping them eat.

Executive Member Joined: Oct 13 2010 Posts: 280

Whoa...you all make it sound so easy!!! Shocked

Hopefully one day I can sound that way too!!
Also, what do you do about younger kids who either need to be fed, or else need to be constantly supervised to make sure they actually eat?
When my kids get older, I'm sure that it will be so much easier, but for now mealtime means that I need to be with them, helping them eat.

Diamond Member Joined: Dec 21 2009 Posts: 3193

We make early Shabbos all summer. I think that's the best solution for anyone with small children.

The boys stay up for kiddush and motzei and eat a little salad and then it's bedtime.
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Platinum Member Joined: Apr 12 2010 Posts: 5882

I give ds a late 'snack' while I am in the shower/doing make up then I can light and daven then start getting him ready for bed. If I am really advanced I give him full supper before I light.
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Gold Member Joined: Jan 27 2010 Posts: 1462

Since Erev shabbos is so hectic ds ends up taking a later nap many weeks. If he is awake and in a good mood he stays up until the fish. If he is in a bad mood he goes to bed.

Disclaimer: I am generally relaxed about bed time and he is fairly easy going with most things.