"English" nicknames for Jewish names

Gold Member Joined: May 09 2010 Posts: 2156

So, DH and I have a girl's name picked out but we're disagreeing over boy ideas. One thing we're undecided about is using an English-style nickname for a Hebrew name - like Josh for Yehoshua, or Gabe for Gavriel, or calling the kid Jeremy instead of Yirmiyahu. It just happens to be that in these cases we like the English sounding nickname better than any of the more obviously Jewish alternatives (like Shuey or Gavi) - it's not a matter of deliberately trying to sound secular.

What do you all think? Would you be put off by a boy walking into a yeshiva ketana and introducing himself as Gabe? Would you do it for certain names and not others?

IDK, we alternated between Josh and Yehoshua for my DS. When there was another Yehoshua in his 3rd grade class, he told them all to call him Josh, and now he is the only kid with an English name in his yeshiva, because his classmates got so used to calling him that when he was younger.

it really depends on your circles. In my community that is definitely making a statement when you do that. Why does a non Jewish nickname sound better to you then a jewish one??

I wouldn't be turned off by it at all. I love so many of the English boy names: Noah, Daniel, Judah, etc... I would love to use them but I live in Israel and I don't think it would work.

I really don't think it is an issue , my sons are in a right wing charedi cheder and between them have friends who go by Josh, Sammy and Zak.

As much as I like certain English names and nicknames, I'd feel uncomfortable using them for my children. As it is, one kid often gets called by the English pronunciation of the name. It's a little grating. We're Jewish.

I'd probably do it for some names and not others. Benjy for Benyamin seems to be around in most circles, never come across Gabe, but Gabi is around, Abie for Avraham, my nephew goes by Matti for Matisyahu. ... wouldn't do Jeremy for Yirmiyahu, doesn't really fall into the nickname bracket.

Gold Member Joined: May 09 2010 Posts: 2156

Gold Member Joined: Jul 30 2009 Posts: 1743

In my circles (yeshivish OOT), I'd probably assume that an Anglicized name or nickname (Ben, Zach, etc.) means the parents are BTs (giving a name that relative could relate to and pronounce), or at least gave that option deliberately to their kids to allow them to blend more easily into the "outside world".

When classmates and seminary-mates of mine got married, I always thought, "huh. I wonder what his story is." when their chosson went by a name like Josh or Benjy but wore the penguin l'vush and learned in kollel, but it was just a quick first reaction.

Some nicknames are organic and have nothing to with modernity -- my brother in 8th grade has a friend Eliyahu Moshe who's been going by "Elmo" for years. Laughing

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I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

Some edot find it "modern" to give no secular name. When my fil named my husband, say, Yehoshua instead of Joshua (on his papers), people told him it's not the traditional way.
Some even hold the Jewish name should be hidden from being sullied by non jews saying it (for real...)

I only learned the French chief rabbi (Yekk)'s Jewish name by chance as he only uses it for bris/alia/brachot/wedding etc. He's no BT, his father was a kollel man in a time it was basically a rarity...
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"You will have many many children and make successful shidduchim beh", rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
"It's all cultural, disagree respectfully", me

DD #2 is named after my husband's grandmother (mother's mother), who had two names. We gave both.

When we were discussing the name (hypothetically; we didn't know I was having a girl), I just kept saying that I was SURE that I would end up calling her an English nickname off the second name. (This isn't her name, but let's say her name was Sara Chanah, I was sure I would end up calling her Hannah.)

My MIL told my husband, in no uncertain terms, that she did not care what we named the baby, so long as I was happy with the name. But that we should please not name after her mother if we would end up calling her an English name. There is another niece named after her and they call her the English name and my MIL hates it.

My husband was also very afraid of how it would come across (calling our daughter an English name) since we live in Lakewood.

We ended up giving the name anyway and despite my being convinced that's that what would happen, we ended up nicknaming her off the first name and now I have these two beautiful girls with very chassidish names/nicknames and everytime someone finds out that those are the names of my daughters they go Shocked

In short: you might surprise yourself when you actually meet this kid.

Gold Member Joined: May 09 2010 Posts: 2156

Silver Member Joined: May 01 2012 Posts: 640

I know a Rabbi Gabe but he is a different generation, obviously....
Personally I steered away from names that I would not feel OK with the usual Hebrew nicknames. Even if you don't call them by it, someone else they know might!
Also once the nickname is on the kid, it stays.
As we see from Rabbi Gabe....

@spring13: there really weren't a whole lot of options and once DD was born, we realized that she couldn't be anything other than the name that she is, with the nickname that she has. She is (so I'm told) really living up to her namesake.

(And with DD #1, we took her name from here -- a many times great-grandmother -- and from there -- having to do with the time of year she was born -- after she was born. A lot of people thought it was odd then, too and I was a little insecure about it. Now, we realize how completely she is that name.)