Compassion leave for a babysitter?

So I have this wonderful woman in her 50s who looks after the children and do the school runs. I know her dad has been ill but she told me today that she can't come to work for us from next week because drs told her her dad has less than 2 months to live. On one hand, I totally have sympathy for her so I told her she can take as much time she needs to look after him. She's really good so I'm willing to keep the position open for her. On the other hand, that means I have to find someone to do the school runs which is not easy 'cuz most aupairs and babysitters in my area don't drive or have cars. No other parents nearby to do carpooling. Both DH and I work so we can't do school runs every single day. WWYD?

Just saying... The doctors might be wrong and she may be gone for longer than two months...
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Posted: Wed, Nov 09 2011, 2:55 am Post subject:

Can you ask her to do the actual driving and tell her you'll find someone else to do the afterschool care hours until she's ready to come back?
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can you get/pay a parent in your kids school to bring them home?

Gold Member Joined: Jul 02 2010 Posts: 1416

If she's been with you for a while, and she is important to your family, then its appropriate to treat her request with compassion.

I am sure she hopes her dad lives more than 2 months, but that is not the point. She's asking for compassion leave, which for sure inconveniences you, but is the right thing to do. Wouldn't you want your employer to give you the same consideration if you were facing a serious illness in your family? Why should this be any different?

As for asking her to do the pickups - I'm assuming she won't be local while she's caring for her dad. She would have offered it if it were possible.

Give her the time and space to say goodbye to her dad and help him see his daughter in his final days.

You can find a temporary babysitter. Is there someone who is on maternity leave and doesn't need their sitter as much? Or a sitter who is looking for full-time work but would take this gig temporarily while she's still available?

I know in my community there are emails on our community email list listing bbsitters on a daily basis. Check to see if there's such a list by you - you may have more options than you think.

Chavelamomela thank you so much for putting things into perspective. DH also thinks it was the right thing to let her take whatever time she needs to look after her dad. She explained to me that her dad needs carer 24/7 so thats why she can't do the school runs which means her being out of her house for 1.5hours back and forth. So far no luck finding someone who's available and drives.

Raisin, how do you go about paying another family? I think there is one family whose daughter goes to the same school as my DD. How does it work out if two families are not splitting the driving evenly but one set of parents doing all the driving? I don't want to offend them as I don't know them that well since the girls are in different grades.

Active Poster Joined: Nov 11 2010 Posts: 41