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| amother |
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Amother
Joined: Aug 08 2004
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 Posted: Mon, Oct 31 2011, 5:03 pm Post subject: TERRIBLE 3'S!! |
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| I feel like I'm at my whits end with my 3 year old. When he is home with me I feel like all he does is kvetch and cry and scream. He just went into his room and whenever I come in he screams for no good reason. I just tried coming in again and he slammed the door closed. He screams 'mommy' but when I come in he just yells. I try to discipline him but I get no where. DH is busy almost all day but he is much better at disciplining him. sometimes I wish he was the mommy. How do I deal with this???? I am pulling my hair out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Shalshelet |
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| Posted: Mon, Oct 31 2011, 11:02 pm Post subject: re: TERRIBLE 3'S!! |
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He sounds like he needs your attention. Why not ask him if he wants to play with you or if you could read him a story? Could be you're not giving him enough positive attention, so he seeks out negative attention instead.
When he cries and screams, do you pick him up and comfort him? he may be going through some emotions that are unfamiliar to him and your holding/hugging him may help him feel a bit ore secure. Also try encouraging him to find ways to relax so that you can communicate together.
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| amother |
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Amother
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| Posted: Tue, Nov 01 2011, 10:17 am Post subject: re: TERRIBLE 3'S!! |
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Tell him you only hear when he speaks normally. Ignore or punish, time out, etc but lavish positive attention when he is good. Do not show him he can make u give in.
Read John Rosemond on toddlers.
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| AlwaysGrateful |
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Diamond Member
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| Posted: Tue, Nov 01 2011, 10:19 am Post subject: Re: TERRIBLE 3'S!! |
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| amother wrote: | | I feel like I'm at my whits end with my 3 year old. When he is home with me I feel like all he does is kvetch and cry and scream. He just went into his room and whenever I come in he screams for no good reason. I just tried coming in again and he slammed the door closed. He screams 'mommy' but when I come in he just yells. I try to discipline him but I get no where. DH is busy almost all day but he is much better at disciplining him. sometimes I wish he was the mommy. How do I deal with this???? I am pulling my hair out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
Wow, I was just saying most of this to my dh last night. Doesn't sound quite as bad as your son, but the same idea. A few weeks ago, he was fine, and just now he's started getting really aggressive, defiant, and just screaming for no apparent reason. Here's what I did.
One time when he's NOT upset (yet), try to get him on your lap. You might offer to tell him a story, read him a book, something like that to get him calm. Then gently say to him that he seems upset recently and ask him if everything is okay. Tell him that you feel confused when he calls for you and then doesn't want you to come, or screams when you get there. Ask him what he wants you to do instead.
We can't tell you what the problem is. Only he can explain his reasoning. And for all we know, it's something as simple as "When I call you and you walk in you always look upset" or something as 3-year-old appopriate as "When I call you, I want you to sneak up on me, not just walk into the room." He has no idea you can't read his mind.
(I've found out a lot about my ds this way. In fact, just last week I found out that he's really upset about another kid in gan who has been picking on him. When I talked to his teacher about it, she said she's aware of the problem but told me that based on what I told her, she'll be more aggressive at making sure it's not a problem anymore.)
A three year old can tell you more than you think...
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