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Structured play or free play when the kids get home?

 
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amother
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 12:29 pm    Post subject: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
When your kids come home, in the afternoon hours, do they do structured things or do you let them entertain themselves and play freely with their toys?

I pretty much let my kids do whatever they want... which usually involves them jumping on furniture, riding around in their toy cars and making lots of noise. DH thinks I should be more structured with them, but I thought that's just how kids play.

What do you think?
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drumjj
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 12:34 pm    Post subject:
 
I think they r structured in school all day this is there time to let it out a bit before bed time
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 12:36 pm    Post subject: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
Kids' schedules are structured all day in school. When they get home, they need to have freedom to play as they please. Too much structure isn't good for kids.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 12:39 pm    Post subject:
 
I'm a big supporter of free play, but if I see my kids are having a hard time choosing on their own something productive to do, I might suggest something...
One big clue is how they're "hungry" which to them is a synonym for bored...if they can't find a way to entertain themselves, I'll suggest some coloring or a toy they haven't played with in a while, etc...usually after such an activity, they've recouped enough of their own creativity to come up with something to do.

Example: Yesterday I suggested to my older son to color and cut a bear project he got from the library program at school while I let my younger 2 play with magna doodle knockoffs. He got tired of it in the middle, and then all 3 went and found books they "read" to themselves, and then played with dolls, before going back to coloring...Much less snacking and fighting because they were kept productively busy.

If they can think of something to do by themselves, by all means, let them!
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 12:52 pm    Post subject: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
I have 2 boys ka'h (3.5 and 1.5) and by us "free play" is equivalent to jumping off couches, sliding down the stairs and climbing on things - you get the picture. I still haven't found an activity for them that they can do on their own for more than 5 minutes which is not destructive.

HY, reading your post made me slightly jealous Embarassed . I hope I am not hijacking this thread – can you or someone else give suggestions for “free play” activities that kids can do without constant supervision (meaning I am in the same room or in the room next to them, but doing other things)? Or maybe my kids are still too little for that (we have crayons, legos, tons of little cars etc – they are either not interested at all or play for 3 minutes and then start throwing things all over the room)
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Hashem_Yaazor
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 1:22 pm    Post subject:
 
I think it definitely helps that I have an older son with a longer attention span than many other kids, and his siblings sort of try to take after him...But my kids can spend quite a while with coloring and stickers (my 3 year old chooses to either color something in the lines which can take a while or a blank paper and use all the crayon colors which can also take a while Smile)...My daughter just hangs around them and does her own thing or if she loses interest, she'll come to the kitchen and ask to sit up and watch me wash dishes/prepare dinner.
I also have kids knex which keep them busy. My 4.5 year old can build from the pictures, while my 3 year old just puts together things however he wants.
It helps that I don't keep all the toys out, so it feels special if I offer to take down something for them.
My kids are also old enough to play simple games like memory, go fish, kosherland (or whatever that board game is called), etc...
It wasn't that easy a year and a half ago when I had 2 boys similar in age to you...it DOES get easier Smile
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SV
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 1:28 pm    Post subject:
 
Hashem_Yaazor wrote:
I think it definitely helps that I have an older son with a longer attention span than many other kids, and his siblings sort of try to take after him...But my kids can spend quite a while with coloring and stickers (my 3 year old chooses to either color something in the lines which can take a while or a blank paper and use all the crayon colors which can also take a while Smile)...My daughter just hangs around them and does her own thing or if she loses interest, she'll come to the kitchen and ask to sit up and watch me wash dishes/prepare dinner.
I also have kids knex which keep them busy. My 4.5 year old can build from the pictures, while my 3 year old just puts together things however he wants.
It helps that I don't keep all the toys out, so it feels special if I offer to take down something for them.
My kids are also old enough to play simple games like memory, go fish, kosherland (or whatever that board game is called), etc...
It wasn't that easy a year and a half ago when I had 2 boys similar in age to you...it DOES get easier Smile


Sigh. That's what I thought. Thanks for responding anyway Smile
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 1:41 pm    Post subject: Re: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
SV wrote:
I have 2 boys ka'h (3.5 and 1.5) and by us "free play" is equivalent to jumping off couches, sliding down the stairs and climbing on things - you get the picture. I still haven't found an activity for them that they can do on their own for more than 5 minutes which is not destructive.

HY, reading your post made me slightly jealous Embarassed . I hope I am not hijacking this thread – can you or someone else give suggestions for “free play” activities that kids can do without constant supervision (meaning I am in the same room or in the room next to them, but doing other things)? Or maybe my kids are still too little for that (we have crayons, legos, tons of little cars etc – they are either not interested at all or play for 3 minutes and then start throwing things all over the room)


OP here. Yes, that's exactly what I'm looking for!
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Hashem_Yaazor
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 1:48 pm    Post subject:
 
OP, how old are your kids?
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:06 pm    Post subject:
 
Hashem_Yaazor wrote:
OP, how old are your kids?


The younger ones are 6, 4, 2 1/2.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:15 pm    Post subject:
 
I would think that most 6 year olds would be kept quite busy with building toys, but if your child has to sit for lengths at a time at school perhaps (s)he really needs to get out energy then and not sit around and play with building toys...
?
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SV
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:21 pm    Post subject: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
http://www.walmart.com/catalog/allReviews.do?product_id=10982839

I have been considering something like this but I am not sure where I would put it (the point of this is that it's small enough to be kept inside the house)
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:28 pm    Post subject:
 
When ds comes home, he just needs noone to look at him or talk to him and chill till dinnertime. His siblings that come home earlier usually need something structured -I give a choice of toys for them to play with or something to do otherwise they ask for food the whole afternoon.
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:33 pm    Post subject: Re: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
SV wrote:
I have 2 boys ka'h (3.5 and 1.5) and by us "free play" is equivalent to jumping off couches, sliding down the stairs and climbing on things - you get the picture. I still haven't found an activity for them that they can do on their own for more than 5 minutes which is not destructive.

HY, reading your post made me slightly jealous Embarassed . I hope I am not hijacking this thread – can you or someone else give suggestions for “free play” activities that kids can do without constant supervision (meaning I am in the same room or in the room next to them, but doing other things)? Or maybe my kids are still too little for that (we have crayons, legos, tons of little cars etc – they are either not interested at all or play for 3 minutes and then start throwing things all over the room)


My boys are about the same age (almost 2, 3.5 and a newborn). I find I have that if I sit with them the activity is fun and can last forever. Most times as soon as I leave to do something they lose interest.

I try to print parsha pictures for them to color next to me when I try to work when they are home. Or use the playdough at the kitchen table when I'm trying to cook. This way they are doing the activity near me and I'm kind of involved when I need to be doing other stuff.

But most of the time I'm really just sitting and watching them play.

the best play that keeps them busy is outdoors - I'm just waiting for the weather to get nicer.
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 2:52 pm    Post subject: Re: re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
sky wrote:


the best play that keeps them busy is outdoors - I'm just waiting for the weather to get nicer.
Ditto!

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Truth is, many times our activities in the evening will involve helping me in the kitchen (though we're B"H running out of space with 3 kids trying to have a spot by the counter!)
Tonight, for example, we plan on making pizza. That will be the "structured" activity. If my kids feel they want to play or be by themselves, they will go ahead and do so and I'll be happy to let them have their "free" time...But if they need something to keep them occupied, they can help mix up the dough, roll their own pizzas, top them, etc.

My guess is that they'll split their time. Knowing my oldest, he'll probably come "help" in the middle. My second will start off, but take a break after the dough is mixed up. And my third will want to sit and watch us.

Sunday night, we made pumpkin muffins together and my oldest opted out which was fine since he was keeping productively busy by making cereal necklaces. (That's a good activity, BTW. We use a pipe cleaner or lanyard and Cheerios and it keeps them busy as well as providing a snack when they are done. My oldest usually makes one for my daughter as well Smile)

Sometimes one of my boys will "wash" dishes in the sink while I'm preparing dinner. I might have to rewash what they clean, but it's a good learning skill nonetheless and is not destructive...
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 3:13 pm    Post subject:
 
You all make good points about school being structured so they need to have free play at home & my kids free play all the time. But OP, if your kids are jumping on the couch, that's not free play. Thats being bored with their toys so they may need a specific toy or activity given to them to do - video, painting, coloring, playdoh
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PostPosted: Wed, Jan 13 2010, 3:46 pm    Post subject: Re: Structured play or free play when the kids get home?
 
amother wrote:
When your kids come home, in the afternoon hours, do they do structured things or do you let them entertain themselves and play freely with their toys?

I pretty much let my kids do whatever they want... which usually involves them jumping on furniture, riding around in their toy cars and making lots of noise. DH thinks I should be more structured with them, but I thought that's just how kids play.

What do you think?


Yeesh, they're kids, not soldiers, and even soldiers get some free time during the day. That doesn't mean it has to be hefkervelt and allowing them to destroy the house; it means they can choose their own activity and entertain themselves without Momma forcing every second to be a Teaching Moment.
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